HOW TO HANDLE DIFFICULT/STUBBORN CHILDREN
Right from beginning of the existence of man there has been both obedient and stubborn children. It is the phenomenon of bad and evil that rule the world as a result of the fall of man in the Garden of Eden. Gen.3:1-8. In Deuteronomy 21:18-20 God instructed Moses that stubborn children should be brought out to the elders of his city, then all the men of his city should stone him to death with stones. The reason God gave for this action was that by so doing “evil will be put away and all Israel will fear”. This was the situation in the Old Testament however since the priesthood has been changed, the law has also been changed. Heb.7:12.
God wants parents today not to provoke their children to wrath but to bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. Eph.6:4
Stubborn children in your family today are not a curse but a blessing in disguise. Many of you, parents of today were stubborn children some years back but have over grown that and have become useful people in the society. This was made possible through the concerted effort of your parents to make you become a useful person in life. You must accept stubborn children, love them, train them and accept it as your responsibility to assist them to change.
Do stubborn children exist? The Bible says yes. Deut.21:18-20. We learnt of the children of Eli who refused to listen to the people and did abominable things, the result was death. 1Sam.2:12,22; 4:15-18. We learn of Absalom who plotted to over throw King David his father militarily but died in the war. 2Sam.16:21; 17:1-26; 18:1-18. We have a great responsibility as parents to tame our children. Prov.22:6; Eph.6:4
How to handle and tame stubborn children
i. Identify it early. Be vigilant as a parents and ensure you identify a stubborn child early and apply different methods for his upbringing.
ii. Love them and Listen to them. Ensure you listen to them, show them love and proffer solution to their problems. Colossians 3:21
iii. Provide things in your house that will make them to stay at home most of the time such as toys, tv, radio, games, cartoons, etc. As we know evil association corrupts good moral especially at that tender age. 1Cor.15:33
iv. Discipline them when the need arises. Do not withhold the rod of correction from them. Proverbs 22:15 says “Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; the rod of correction will drive it far from him”. However, ensure you do not maim them or be too hard on them to force them run out of home. As the adage says, “you use one hand to beat a child and another to draw him back”.
v. Pray for them and pray with them constantly. God is able to soften the heart of stone. He will turn the heart of stone to a heart of flesh. All you must do is to ask God with faith. Ezekiel 36:26; Matt.7:7-11; James 5:16. Ensure you involve them in prayers. Let them pray that God should change their hearts to hearts of flesh.
vi. Show them exemplary behaviour/lifestle. Do not lie, cheat, smoke, drink, beat your wife, abuse your husband, display stubborn attitude to your spouse or in your community /society. Provide for honest things in the sight God and man. 2Cor.8:21.
vii. Relocate your family or your children. Where the neighbourhood is influencing your children negatively, please change your residence. If the problem is from their school, please relocate them to another school.
viii. Introduce them to what they love doing as a career. Do not discourage the ones that want to engage in any good sport or vocation such as athletics, football, comedy, broadcasting, acting, singing, etc but watch out and ensure they do not go into hard drugs, smoking, drinking and following bad friends.
ix. Introduce them to God early. Take them to Church regularly. Read the Bible to them. Allow them to read the Bible to the family and memorise some Bible passages. Psalm 119:105 says “Your word is a lamp to my feet, and a light to my path”.
We encourage to visit the Church of Christ where the truth that leads to salvation is not only taught but practiced. Your children shall not be a burden to you or bring you shame but honour, joy and peace in Jesus name. Amen.
Scripted by Elijah Abire (an Evangelist) and powered by evangelismportal.org